... and why emotional health mattered more than the adventure.
Have you ever spent months planning something, telling everyone about it, getting excited, and then realizing... yeah, nope?
That's us right now.
Back in October, I practically shouted from the rooftops that we were about to embark on the most epic road trip ever. Six kids, a fifth wheel we lovingly named the Raptor, and the open road—what could go wrong? (Cue ominous music.)
Well, reality set in.
Turns out, homeschooling six kids in 400 square feet while driving across the country sounds like an incredible adventure. Still, when you think about the logistics—where to travel, how to not lose your mind in a tiny space, how to keep everyone from mutinying somewhere in the middle of Kansas—you start to question your life choices.
And then there's the Raptor itself. Our beloved fifth wheel is great… until you start looking at everything that needs to be brought along and magically has to fit so we don't feel like sardines. At some point, Bill and I looked at each other and realized that maybe—just maybe—this wasn't the adventure we really wanted.
So, instead of gallivanting across the country, we're now up to our elbows in home remodeling, getting our house ready to sell, and planning a move to a new state.
Which state, you ask? Excellent question. We're still figuring that out, but the list is short, and the excitement is real. And honestly? We feel great about it.
Because here's the thing—dreams evolve. Just because we spent months planning something doesn't mean we have to force it when we realize it's not the best fit. We're still embracing adventure, just in a different way. One that doesn't involve me trying to cook dinner in a kitchen the size of a closet while six children, one adult, and two large dogs are all trying navigate that same area. The kitchen and living area are one-in-the-same, less than 10' x 10'.
But here's where this gets deeper. What does this have to do with emotional health? Everything.
The Emotional Frequency of Change
In Victorious Mother, I discuss emotions as energy in motion. Every feeling carries a frequency that impacts our health, stress levels, and decision-making ability. And let me tell you—scrapping a dream, shifting gears, and reimagining your future? That's an emotional rollercoaster.
At first, I felt disappointed in myself for "quitting". I had built up this massive anticipation for full-time RV life. I had told my audience, friends, and kids we were ready! But when we realized how much stress it was adding before we had even left our property, we realized it wasn't the right fit; I had a choice: clutch onto the disappointment or shift into excitement for what was next.
And here's what I remembered: your body follows the emotions you feed it.
Negative emotions—stress, frustration, guilt, fear—drag your frequency down, lowering your immune system, making you tired, and leaving you stuck. But choosing positive emotions—like excitement, joy, and faith—raises your frequency. That's not just a fluffy thought; it's science. It's why some people radiate positivity and gratitude, and others carry a raincloud everywhere they go.
So instead of clinging to the disappointment I felt in myself, I chose a different path:
Gratitude:Â Instead of beating myself up for "quitting", I started looking forward to what was: a fresh start in a state more aligned with our family's beliefs, a new home (where we all have personal space!), and new opportunities to make new friends and neighbors, in what will be (Lord willing), our forever home.
Faith over Fear:Â Fear of change can be paralyzing. But choosing faith shifts how I feel. Faith that we're making the right decision for our family's hopes and dreams. We want trees, green grass, a beautiful home with lots of room to homeschool our kids, and room to expand when they bring grandkids one day! A home state that isn't a daily battle for safety for our girls. A safe neighborhood where our boys ride bikes up and down the street. Faith that these next steps will reveal themselves and that God will guide us as choices must be made.
Laughter over Stress: Do I feel overwhelmed about remodeling and selling a house with no precise location to move to? Absolutely. But guess what neutralizes stress? Laughter. The opposite of anger and fear, the root of all stress. We take long breaks every day to find joy and laugh—we've seen some hilarious movies lately. When I think about our beloved Raptor, I joke that we have a posh on-site hotel as we remodel our home. All of us may be covered head to toe in construction dust, but humor resets my emotions in the right direction.
We could have forced the RV life to work. We could have pushed through, ignored our gut, and stuck to the plan just because we said we would do it. But at what cost? Stress? Anxiety? Burnout?
Too many people do that in life. They ignore their emotional well-being, keep walking the same well-worn path of fear, stress, or anger, and wonder why they feel stuck.
In Chapter 8 of Victorious Mother, I discuss how emotions create actual pathways in the brain. The more you feed a particular emotion—whether it's worry, frustration, or joy—the stronger that pathway becomes. If I had continued to force a plan that didn't bring us incredible joy, disappointment and stress would have dominated my emotions, and that would have been the road my brain naturally traveled all day, every day.
But instead, I'm choosing to rewrite the path.
Every morning, I put a few drops of Peace & Calming® or Joy™ essential oils on my wrists and over my heart. I take a deep breath and remind myself: "This new path is still an adventure, one that has all of us filled with excitement."
And guess what? I feel lighter. I feel energized. Because my emotions are following the path I'm paving, not the one trying to pull me back.
What's Next?
First, I want to finish this remodel without losing my mind. I may or may not be diffusing an unreasonable amount of Stress Awayâ„¢ in the process.
Second, finding our new home state! We've narrowed it down, and we're praying through it. (Any guesses?!)
Third, I'm taking you all along for the ride. This transition isn't just about a move - it's about emotional health, trusting the process, and creating a life that truly fits.
So tell me, have you ever made a big life decision only to realize you needed a significant course correction to another equally big life decision? How did you handle it? I'd love to hear your stories!